Loneliest job in the world

The Loneliest job in the world

• Working down a Mine? No
• Cleaning a church when everyone's gone away? No
• True answer: a) living with dementia
• b) living with someone who has dementia

Being pinned down by a close relative with dementia is the toughest most demanding long-term task. And it's scary to have dementia so naturally you try to cling on to the people you know. You might shadow people without realising that they need time to themselves. They might need to go shopping or meet friends but that's a problem. There's no let-up even st night.

To shore up your self esteem you create imaginary people: parents, friends long dead, you live in the past, it may be more comfortable than facing the fact that you have dementia and it's getting worse every day.

What else can you do? The care home experience is institutionalised, regimented, impersonal, so people struggle on. 

Friends turn away, as if the dementia might infect them, they may not have the patience to see there's a person still there some of the time.

So what is the answer? Carer support and befriending?

People do live happily with dementia and carers do cope but it must be the hardest job in the world.